I love him, I don’t like what he did
This extremely important and compassionate Islamic principle can be taught to our children at an early age…
Kids have this black and white approach (because they are kids) to things:
When a friend says/does something mean, they immediately say = I don’t love him anymore, or he is not my friend anymore !!!
Each time this happens, just tell your child lovingly: you love him, you just don’t like what he did/said….
Also, whenever the opportunity presents itself, remind your children: we love EVERYONE because God is creating them…. We don’t like bad behavior/words.
Don’t think that they are not intellectually developed enough to pick up on the nuance, because they DO!
We have been doing this since she began talking and expressing her emotions/thoughts about other people and events.
The other day she was relating something that happened at school.
She said: I don’t like Christoph because he pushed me at school today….
Then she posed and said: Well…. I like him, but I don’t like what he did….
She is 4!
If she is capable of understanding this and practicing this, it shows that it is only a matter of being exposed to this approach enough times.
There are so many adults out there who would write off a person after one mistake they see. If we raise our children with this compassionate (and reasonable) approach to other people, the world would be a more peaceful place…
Hence the reason why God teaches us this approach in the guidebooks that are meant to bring inner and outer peace…