Listen to your child
They are not just a 4 year old, 6 year old…. kid who do not understand what is going on around them, who are silly at best…
They are individuals; human beings who have dignity and who deserve to be treated with dignity.
It is easy for us to look at an adult and see/treat them with dignity. The real challenge/training is for us to treat a ‘silly’ 4 year old with dignity that God’s highest form of creation – the human- deserves.
Kids understand so much more than we think they do. They are aware of the joy in the house. They are aware of the tension between their parents. They sense if you do not like someone.
Kids are able to ‘know’ all this not through their intellectual capabilities, but through their soul. The soul feels. The soul senses. The soul is cabaple to ‘know’ so much more than our intellect can ever know.
If we are ignoring our child to continue our conversation with a friend/spouse,
If we are treating cooking as more important than looking into our kids’ eyes and listening to their stories,
If we never ask them how their day at school was,
If we laugh when they explain how something small broke their heart at school,
If we keep shutting them up each time they ask for something….
What message are we giving them?
Last night, we were at the dinner table. Me, my spouse, and a guest, along with our daughter. She kept trying to be part of the conversation, laughing when we laugh and trying to interject often. We on the other hand continued our conversation, answering her only when she got really loud and ignoring her most of the other times…
She said all of a sudden, in a rather calm voice as if relating a story: “When I have children, I will not pay attention to them. Because they will be bad kids…”
! ! !
She was not saying this to get back at us or to make us realize something. She often talks about stories of how she will be and what she will do when she is a grown up. This statement was something like this.
It just made my heart skip a beat….
Our daughter is very expressive. She is able to relate her feelings and thoughts quite explicitly. Which is good for her and for us. When we act oblivious of her presence and feelings/thoughts, she kindsly reminds us !
After this comment, I took her on my lap, hugged her as much as I could and kissed and literally smelled her baby smell, thanking God that He reminded me through this comment…