How can Marriage and Parenting be Worship?

What is the purpose of our creation?
- God says in the Quran: “I have not created jinn and humankind but to worship/ubudiyah me.”
- What is this Ibadah then that is the reason for our creation?
- Ibadah=>
- We are abd ul-Allah= in essence, it means we are 100% dependent on Him alone.
- ubudiyah= realizing and living our abd-ness = know, love, worship/adore God
- It requires lifelong iman training = 23 years of Quran revelation and training by the Prophet
- How do we “know” God?
- Everything in creation is created for this purpose = they are ayah/signs = they reflect God’s Divine Attributes (Asma ul-Husna)
- g. Apple (or marriage) à reflects God’s Asma à Know à Love à Worship/adore its Creator= Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, Allahuakbar
- There is NO dichotomy between deen & dunya: we only have to train our hearts to see dunya from a Godly perspective = to reflect on the Asma on dunya
- Hence, ONLY purpose of marriage & kids is to know, love, worship God
- There is no separation between religion and marriage, marital problems
- Marriage is created so we learn and reflect patience, love, taking care of, mercy, justice, friendship….. ALL are God’s Asma
- Alternative perspective on marriage?
- Marriage is there to make me happy= ego= Hollywood reinforced perspective (romantic comedies!)
- Egoistic perspective -> war between 2 egos à fight or divorce
- There are countless hadith & ayah on being kind, just, merciful to OTHERS. Start with your SPOUSE & CHILDREN
- 24/7 opportunity to get closer to God if you practice your Islam with your family (I mean be kind and just to them) OR you could just feed your ego/be servant to your ego
- Marriage does not become Islamic by only Islamic niqah & saying we will solve problems Islamically— NOT ENOUGH
- We have to live our Islam and reflect God’s Asma in our relationship with our families
- We need to learn, read, contemplate & PRACTICE, seeing marriage from a QURANIC perspective
- Long term
- But AMAZING reward = peace, heaven HERE & NOW
- Constantly work on your iman AS A COUPLE
- ‘Date night’ alone won’t fix your marriage !!!
- Example:
- If they ask for peace, make peace = forgive (ayah on war can apply to warring spouses too)
- You expect and demand them to love you & show their love
- Ask ourself = is it my ego wanting to be worshipped? Center of attention, be #1
- Embarrassing
- Ask ourself= can he EVER fulfill my heart’s desire to be loved and taken care of?
- Or am I trying to fill a void?
- ONLY GOD’s infinite love can satisfy my heart’s longing for infinity
- This is why I am given this yearning= to find God
- Parenting:
- AMAZING spiritual training ground to get to know GOD = boot camp or PHD
- Patience, creatorship, Razzaq…etc.
- Their vulnerability & 100% dependence as a baby = we are ALWAYS like that with God
- When their ego kicks in = they say “I can do it; I don’t need you” = we do this to God
Our ANCHOR in life is God and developing a Godly perspective on all things in dunya…